I thought I would update you on my Vegas trip I was anticipating in my last blog. From a gambling perspective the weekend went about as well as one could hope for, outside of hitting one of those huge slot jackpots that I always hear about people other than me winning.

As I told you in the blog, my gameplan was to “hit and run” Vegas.

“Y’all just can’t go nailing two boards together. Y’all gots to have a plan!” - anonymous Cajun

And hit and run I did. These 40-something feet took a severe beating. And for the most part, so did the casino’s I played in. I quietly made my way through the Vegas gauntlet, pulling 75 and 100+ dollar chunks from casino after casino. With only the occasional tragic setback to keep my winning streak from reaching epic proportions.

By the time my last night in town rolled around I was well ahead, my bankroll about 50% up for the trip including expenses.

Remember when I talked about greed in my previous blog? And how the greed is your worst enemy in the casino? Well, if you know gamblers, you know stories like the one I am about to tell you.

My weary traveling companions had had enough by 10pm our last night in town. I had beaten them into submission with my casino hopping, and despite the fact that I laid out for cabs from my winnings the last day to relieve our tired old bones, they were spent. We had an early flight, so everybody was wanting to go to bed. Except me. I don’t go to Vegas to sleep. I think I slept a total of 11 hours in 3 nights. Which for me is about average in sin city. I can sleep at home. And when I’m dead. Who sleeps in Vegas?

Anyway, I was exactly in the position I had expected to be in on my last night in town. Ahead. And I planned to stay that way. (don’t we all) So I did a very smart thing. I gave my wife my original stake that I had brought to town with me. I told her not to give it to me under any circumstances until we got to the airport. I took the rest, my “profits” and headed back to “take my shot.”

Now I had the casinos right where I wanted them. I was playing on their dime. House money rocks baby. Nothing burns quicker and more painlessly than house money.

In all seriousness though, this had been the spot I had been waiting for all weekend. Now I was in a position to make some serious money. I was in a position where I could make a short series of large bets without fear, and possibly strike gold. For this had been my plan all along. You don’t get too many serious shots at Vegas. I wasn’t going to miss this opportunity. So back into the night I went.

The first stop was the Monte Carlo, where I was staying. And this brings up an interesting point. The casino where I stayed was one of only two that clipped me pretty good. And why would that be you ask?

Very simple. More time played. It is exactly the phenomenon that I talked about last week. You stay, you pay.

I gave my hotel casino way more chances at my money than the rest, and they clipped me good. Had I not wagered a single bet where I stayed, I would have had no need to “take my shot” or “go for the gusto” because I would have been up a neat 130% for my trip otherwise.

So, this is going to have to be a new rule for me. No session longer than 30 minutes in the casino where I stay, unless I am in the middle of a hot craps shoot or run of blackjack at the time. I did not follow a couple of my rules for this trip and it cost me. It usually does.

Well, as you may have guessed by now I got dinged at the MC one more time. But at least I left quickly, going next door to New York, New York. They quickly got me down and thrashed me as well. So I limped across the street to the MGM Grand. Things went south there as well. It appeared my “hot streak” was in trouble.

Things were looking grim. I lost at blackjack. I lost at craps. I lost at blackjack again. I lost at craps again. My stake was looking thin when I finally found a hot streak at the dice table and ended up getting back and clipping them for a hundred. As I walked toward the cage to cash out, that little voice told me to stop at the blackjack table and take a swing. Done. $50 right out there. Lets do this thing!

I drew an 11 against a dealer 10. I threw two more green chips beside my original bet, drew an 8. Panic sets in. Dealer turns over a 4 for 14 as I breathe a sigh of relief. But all you blackjack players out there know what happened next. The dealer turned over a 7. 21. Boom boom, out go the lights. That one hurt. I was morbid.

So limping off to the cage I went, break even for that stop. I was spinning my wheels. And time was growing short. Back across the street to NY NY I went. I set myself up at the craps table again, and my luck began to change. I caught onto a hot shooter and quickly got healthy again. This was the moment I had been waiting for. Good table. Good energy. Everything was going perfect. I put half my stake on the table. This was my “shot.” Seven out. Line away. On the second freaking roll. The dream was done. I would not be making the “big haul” from Vegas after all.

I could have went to bed right then, but that would have been too smart and dignified. I stayed out and let the rest of the pirhanas slowly eat what was left of my once respectable profits.

But, the important thing is that I lived well for a couple of days. I got to get that gambling jones out of my system. I ate well. I had a good time. I pumped money into that wobbly Vegas economy compliments of the casinos. And all it cost me was a couple of hundred to make the flight. I broke even in Vegas. And like I told you last time around, I consider that a victory!

Maybe next time around I can get this thing right and actually bring home a little piece of Vegas for myself.

A few notes about Vegas. It has been quite awhile since I had been there and I must say the change is remarkable once again. And not all for the good.

* 6-5 blackjack has taken over the strip. I believe the last time I was there about 6 years ago the 6-5 blackjack was mostly reserved for single or double deck games if I am remembering correctly. Now 6-5 is the norm. Traditional blackjack and baccarat are two of the few games that give the player a fighting chance and those are being phased out. The casinos keep pushing the best games to the brink of extinction, and the betting public keeps letting them. Sad.

* There are places that advertise $3 blackjack but for the most part it will be one table in the casino, and someone has to die for you to get a seat. Most of the blackjack tables stayed at $10 during the weekend, and of course in some places you can’t sniff a $10 game. That keeps the riff-raff like me away for the most part though so I guess I understand all that.

* I notice that the casinos have taken distracting their clientele while gaming to a whole new level. From the scantily clad go-go dancers gyrating to pulsating music played at ridiculous volumes at the Flamingo, to the impersonating singing dealers at the Imperial Palace (both are set up right in the middle of the table game pits) the casino’s focus on blurring your focus has never been more aggressive. The casinos used to be content to surround the table areas with the clanging of the slot machines as a constant wear on your central nervous system, but these cheesy new techniques are just plain shameful.

I suggest serious players (those that actually expect to win) avoid those types of situations at all costs. They might be “fun” places, but “fun” usually has it’s price.

* Slot machines. I have never been a slot player. They just aren’t a good bet. The house take is too high and I am bored silly mindlessly pressing the random number generator button for any length of time. But I seemed to notice (and so did my wife – who pays much more attention to the slot area than I) that there seemed to be a conspicuous absence of “jackpots” or any kind of big hits. She witnessed one $600 hit in three days and that was the biggest one she saw by far. I could be wrong, but it seems hard times have hardened the casinos stand on payout percentages. My advice? If you want to play video games, go buy one for $40 and enjoy it the rest of your life. You will easily lose that much in your first 30 minutes of slot play. Play for a couple of more hours and maybe they will throw a buffet your way. Congratulations.

*Speaking of food. We decided to go off the beaten path a bit and went to a locals hang-out called Ellis Island to the east of the strip. Lured by their $6.99 steak dinner (with a free micro-brew) we were lured back the following night by their $7.99 half a rack of BBQ ribs. Excellent food. The amber light beer was good. The food portions were more than adequate. If you require marble tables and ambience for your Vegas dining, stay far away from this one. But if you want one of the last remaining really good dinner deals in Vegas this one is a no-brainer. I will definitely be back.

* The center strip has become so congested that it is nearly impossible to travel the sidewalks on a weekend night. Baby steps at a snails pace was the norm. This is a problem that will need to be addressed at some point I would think.

* We played one of my favorite Vegas games in asking all the cabbies for their best taxi stories. We didn’t get any 5 star winners but were regaled with the sordid details of a fare to “the crawl” involving some muckity muck and a rear-view mirror. And of course we got lots of the typical broken english stories about amazing stupidity, drunkedness, vomiting, and reflections about the relative ease of driving on a road without cows on it. Pretty much the usual fare, but well worth the effort none the less.

Mock Draft 3.0 might require a companion piece.

After all, any mock draft in which the top-ranked running back—one who has drawn at least some comparisons to Adrian Peterson—doesn’t appear in the first round demands a little additional explanation.

It’s not that I don’t like Beanie Wells; in fact, I’m the one who sees similarities between Wells and the Vikings’ All-Pro runner.

Both are bigger than your average feature back, yet have enough speed to hit holes quickly and leave defenders in their wake. Both enter the league with tons of potential, as well as question marks about their durability. And both are likely to be see their draft stock slide to a position lower than their talent would suggest.

But all the way out of the first round entirely?

Actually, I don’t feel quite as queasy about Wells not appearing in the first round after checking the mock draft avid members of The Huddle forums are conducting. In that mock, Wells goes 31st overall to the Cardinals—in other words, just two picks shy of tumbling out of the first round.

Truth be told, I don’t know that anyone would be all that surprised if Wells went to the Browns with the fifth overall selection. The team needs a future beyond Jamal Lewis, Wells would come with a built-in local fan club from his days at Ohio State and Garfield High, and Eric Mangini’s best days with the Jets featured a run-heavy offense.

However, as you might expect from a club that fired its coach and GM and is picking near the top of the draft, the Browns have other needs as well. Mock Draft 3.0 has them taking DE/OLB Brian Orakpo, though if Wake Forest LB Aaron Curry falls to 5 you’d see Mangini sprint to the podium to get the pick in.

The Browns have traded back into the first round in the past—to get Brady Quinn just a couple years back—though that was under a previous administration. Nonetheless, if Wells is hanging around in the late 20s it wouldn’t be prohibitive for the Browns to move up from 36.

Or maybe the Browns’ draft board looks like mine, and they wouldn’t have to move that far.

Ultimately, the range for Wells’ selection is anywhere from 5th to 36th, with a very strong possibility that if he’s trending towards the lower end of that scale at least a couple teams will inquire about trading back up to acquire him. And if he does slip out of the first round entirely, you can bet he’ll bring not only considerable athletic prowess but also a Shaun Rogers-sized chip on his shoulder to his NFL career.

I didn’t go to Las Vegas until I was almost 30 years old. When that plane touched down in “Big People’s Disneyland” I was hooked. Even though I spent/or lost every penny that I brought, I was hooked.

Since that time I got married, and subsequently made a few more trips to Sin City. And yes, I still have not come back from Vegas a winner. Unless you count coming back with all the money you left with winning…which come to think of it pretty much IS a win in Vegas.

I love to tell this story, since it is one of a few lonely moments of glory in my life. The wife and I went with another couple to Vegas in 2000. I took a modest sum of $800 to gamble with and live on for the trip.

Which brings me to a point I would like to mention. Never take more money to Vegas than you are willing to lose. If you can’t blow your bankroll in Vegas in three days, you just aren’t trying. The casinos know that. That is why they are so fond of those 3-4 night “deals.”

Back to the story, as I said I had $800. Pretty slim bankroll, but that is about all I was willing to risk. Well, as the story goes in Vegas, I had some good runs, I had more bad ones. By the time Sunday morning rolled around (the third and last day) I had only a lonely Andrew Jackson in my pocket. I awoke after the customary 3.5 hours sleep in our hotel room, grabbed that 20 out of my pocket and showed it to my wife. “Do you see this honey?” She said, “Is that all you have left?” Ignoring the question I pressed on. “With this, I am going to get back all of my money.”

My wife, wonderful woman that she is, patted me on the shoulder and gave me that look of pity that you might give a homeless orphan wandering the streets,”Okay honey. Okay.”

She let me wallow in my delusion.

You can’t win $800 with a $20 stake. But I was too naive and headstrong to know that. I dressed and went directly downstairs with my last $20. I bought four red chips and put two of them on the pass line. 7 a winner. I was off and running. I quickly built my roll to $100 with a nifty little lucky run. When it ended, and I finally lost I took my profit and went back up to the room. I showed my wife that I had traded my Jackson for a Franklin. It was ON now!

After a relaxing breakfast (which I now did not have to make my wife pay for thankfully), I talked the group into following me around on a “hit and run” trip from the south end of the strip to the center and back. They agreed and off we went. My routine was already set in stone. I walk in and find the craps tables, take a minute to gauge the situation, either place a bet or decide to walk away. If I lost a bet, I left. As long as I kept winning I would stay. On this particular Sunday morning, I didn’t do much losing.

After a lifetime of gambling, I can say with certainty that there are such things as “hot streaks.” There are times when you can’t win a bet to save your life, and there are other times where you can’t lose. I don’t know exactly what happened on that Sunday morning in Vegas. Maybe it was just a very diciplined attack that was aided greatly by a huge dose of luck. But everything I was doing was working. I was in “the zone” for the first time in my gambling life.

We made our way through the two dozen or so casinos relatively quickly. By the time we got back to our hotel casino, I had most of my money back. I was still $150 light though. I walked up the craps table where my streak had began, bought chips and observed for a few moments, then asked the guy next to me, “Hey, how long has in been since an 11 hit?” “I don’t think I have seen one for quite awhile” he replied.

I threw two reds to the stickman, “$10 yo!”

You guessed it. The shooter rolled an eleven. Mission accomplished. The guy standing next to me looked at me like I was some kind of a prophet. It was the crowning moment of my gambling career to that point. I tipped the dealers with the $10 I had won the “yo” with, turned around and bowed to my astonished traveling companions.

The very luckiest part for me though, was that we had planned a trip to the dam for our last day in Vegas. I was not afforded the opportunity to press my luck any further. I strongly suspect that trip to the dam was every bit as important to this “success” story as anything. I was forced to leave town a “winner.”

Since that experience I have become a much more diciplined gambler. I saw the value of the “hit and run” that the late Lyle Stuart talked of in his book, Winning at Casino Gambling. Mr. Stuart pointed out that (as long as you play “smart money” table games like blackjack, baccarat and certain craps bets) you are likely to be ahead at some point in most games you play. That is the point at which you leave.

Greed is as much your enemy in the casino as bad luck. Get lucky. Get out. That is the only gambling “system” that works.

And that is pretty much the philosophy I try to go with now. I have played table games enough that the “thrill” of playing won’t keep me anchored to a table that is hammering me. I am all too willing to leave a losing situation. Just ask any of the dozens of women I dated before I found my wife.

When I go to the casino these days, I am there for one reason only, and that is to leave with more money than I came with. And you absolutely can’t do that regularly if you mill around for hours in one place. The house edge will eventually chip away at your money until it is theirs.

That is one reason I relish the trips to Vegas. The action is everywhere. If you have no luck where you are at there is another place to play right next door. A couple of months ago I found a deal to stay at that hotel where I stayed at for my improbable comeback. The price was ridiculous. $200 for flight and hotel on the south strip? Vegas has finally lured me back after a six year hiatus.

Maybe this time I can go on that winning streak when I get there instead of after I am busted up. That is exactly my intention. I’m going “hit and run” Vegas style. Wish me luck!

Did any of you feel that justice was served when Bernie Madoff was awarded with a life sentence?

The term “justice” is used liberally here in these great United States, but is that really the case? What possible punishment would be just for a man who stole everything except the soul of his victims. Bernie Madoff forever altered the life-course of his victims and their descendants for possibly generations to come.

Bernie Madoff single-handedly has changed the way people think about their money, and the way they think about investing. In the middle of a financial crisis, Bernie Madoff was the worst news possible.

He couldn’t have done any more damage if he had climbed a tower with an assault rifle and turned it loose.

I may come across as some sort of a wacko here, but it won’t be the first time. I am of the opinion that people like Madoff and his kind should be executed. Preferably in the most inhumane way possible, in front of a national audience.

Yeah, I’m a wacko. This country has been moving away from the death sentence even for the worst of offenders. People with no souls whatsoever. People that hack up little children. People that kill old people for their meager possessions. We have “progressed” as a society. It’s all about understanding and compassion. We see no need to off those who have committed horrendous attrocities. No.

Instead, we feed them. Pay their room and board. We put them in little cages where they can’t hurt anybody.

And even when death sentences are handed down our “justice” system lets them appeal their way through life, all on society’s dime.

Why?

We now have science on our side. DNA testing has made determination of murderers fool-proof in many instances. One of my personal main objections to the death penalty has been removed. The spectre of doubt.

But where there is no doubt, why do we need to keep these cold-blooded murderers around? Does it really make sense? How is our society better by keeping them around? Do we feel redeemed that they are “suffering” in this prison? Is that more humane than simply ending their useless existance?

Bernie Madoff is just as guilty of crimes against humanity as any murderer. The damage he did is just as far reaching, and probably more impactful than all but the most horrific criminals in history. So he got life in prison. Big deal. The guy is 70. His crimes made him a very wealthy and comfortable man for the last two decades. I have to tell you, if you made me an offer right now to live like Madoff lived for the next 20 years of my life, followed by a prison stint to close the deal, I would almost have to be a fool to pass it up wouldn’t I?

Where is the deterrant? What is the downside?

Until we as a people decide that stealing with a briefcase is as bad or worse than stealing with a gun, little Bernie Madoffs will continue to sprout up like poison ivy in the middle of our little American garden party. And you don’t put weeds in cages when they sprout up in your garden, you kill them.

It really isn’t that complicated.

When word came down that Terrell Owens had been cut by the Cowboys, I was not particularly surprised. Witness my comments about Miles Austin a few weeks ago. I don’t know why, but I felt that Jerry Jones was about to have an epiphany, much like he did right before he hired Bill Parcells. But I digress.

The Cowboys have problems. And you have to figure that T.O. was as much a part of those problems as anybody. Add that to the fact that even a fine physical specimen like Owens succumbs to the body blows dealt out by father time eventually. And the icing on the cake was Owens nice high salary. You had a situation that reeked of change.

That had to happen before this franchise could move forward. Great move for the Cowboys.

“Me” guys generally don’t win championships. T.O. will never win a championship. Unless there is someday a championship for mind boggling statements given while doing push-ups in ones driveway.

Teams win championships. Teams without “me” guys. Congratulations Mr. Jones, you have taken a critical first step toward success in the National Football League. Next, you may want to consider hiring a real head coach that has the balls to tell you to “no” whenever necessary, which from the looks of things right now is quite often.

I mean, if you really want to get serious about this…